So I wanted to review this movie, before its release on DVD May 11, 2010. I'm not exactly a person who gets really excited about movies but because I was working my book, which was about angels, I decided to look into Legion the movie. I walked into the theater with high hopes which morphed into criticizing cries minutes after the movie begun!
The movie is about the apocalypse brought down by a Christian God, because supposedly he now hates everyone and is over everybody's crap. So he sends down a bunch of angels to go kill everyone... but wait... Holy crap, there's a baby messiah!!! Not for nothing... It was pretty terrible.
First of all.... The title of movie is misleading. In biblical terms, "Legion", is a multi-body demon that possesses people. (Nice concept huh? Maybe I'm going to use him in my series) Legion is not... an army of angels. And would God really destroy the world like this? I thought floods, and fire... crap like that was more his style... But wuteve...
So as I climbed over the lil hump of God destroying the world in such an uncreative way and time consuming way. The angels... began possessing people, going after the unborn messiah. I wouldn't have a problem with this except for the fact that the angels were just so stank! I didn't know doing God's work entailed cursing people out! Seriously they looked and behaved more like demons. That Granny was so dang rude. It made no sense for angels to have human flesh shredding teeth, when they're the cute embodiments of light and purity. Wtf?! Then by the end of the movie... we see angels in their pure form... and they look normal. So what was with the gross Icecream men and kids? Hmph.
If it wasn't clear at all... Not much mythology was incorporated. The writers never even picked up a bible. They made the Christian God, look like a confused teenager, instead of the Omnipotent master of the universe. The angels were suppose to "Give God what he needed, instead of what he wants" Um excuse me, who created the angels? The angels aren't even suppose to have free will really. And also God... kinda just gets what he wants and needs by himself. -_- He is after all... OMIPOTENT.
The characters were all actually pretty damn lame. One of the main character's name is "Jeep"...
Classy... I don't get what was wrong with his parents. But they were all stereotypes that never really experience any true growth. Boring and flat... Their dialogue was crappy.
My fave line:
Tyrese : "When I was a shorty...."
Thanks... because Tyrese you know nobody says that. >_<
If you weren't in Lady Gaga's and Beyonce's video... I'd finish you Tyrese.
The graphics were average and very far and few between. We mostly see a bunch of shooting. Legion's plot holes, the complete agility of a pregnant smoking woman, unexplained occurrences, and cheesy lines made this movie mildly enjoyable.
2.5/5
La'Von Gittens
NoV'al Publishing
www.novalpublishing.com
