Legion the Movie

So I wanted to review this movie, before its release on DVD May 11, 2010. I'm not exactly a person who gets really excited about movies but because I was working my book, which was about angels, I decided to look into Legion the movie. I walked into the theater with high hopes which morphed into criticizing cries minutes after the movie begun!

The movie is about the apocalypse brought down by a Christian God, because supposedly he now hates everyone and is over everybody's crap. So he sends down a bunch of angels to go kill everyone... but wait... Holy crap, there's a baby messiah!!! Not for nothing... It was pretty terrible.

First of all.... The title of movie is misleading. In biblical terms, "Legion", is a multi-body demon that possesses people. (Nice concept huh? Maybe I'm going to use him in my series) Legion is not... an army of angels. And would God really destroy the world like this? I thought floods, and fire... crap like that was more his style... But wuteve...

So as I climbed over the lil hump of God destroying the world in such an uncreative way and time consuming way. The angels... began possessing people, going after the unborn messiah. I wouldn't have a problem with this except for the fact that the angels were just so stank! I didn't know doing God's work entailed cursing people out! Seriously they looked and behaved more like demons. That Granny was so dang rude. It made no sense for angels to have human flesh shredding teeth, when they're the cute embodiments of light and purity. Wtf?! Then by the end of the movie... we see angels in their pure form... and they look normal. So what was with the gross Icecream men and kids? Hmph.

If it wasn't clear at all... Not much mythology was incorporated. The writers never even picked up a bible. They made the Christian God, look like a confused teenager, instead of the Omnipotent master of the universe. The angels were suppose to "Give God what he needed, instead of what he wants" Um excuse me, who created the angels? The angels aren't even suppose to have free will really. And also God... kinda just gets what he wants and needs by himself. -_- He is after all... OMIPOTENT.

The characters were all actually pretty damn lame. One of the main character's name is "Jeep"...
Classy... I don't get what was wrong with his parents. But they were all stereotypes that never really experience any true growth. Boring and flat... Their dialogue was crappy.
My fave line:
Tyrese : "When I was a shorty...."

Thanks... because Tyrese you know nobody says that. >_<
If you weren't in Lady Gaga's and Beyonce's video... I'd finish you Tyrese.

The graphics were average and very far and few between. We mostly see a bunch of shooting. Legion's plot holes, the complete agility of a pregnant smoking woman, unexplained occurrences, and cheesy lines made this movie mildly enjoyable.


2.5/5

La'Von Gittens
NoV'al Publishing
www.novalpublishing.com

Visual Novel

∀ Visual Novel. Do you know what one is? Hmmmm! O₭ay, they're a little hard to explain. It's a basically a book, on your computer that you can read, the text is accompanied by 2D pictures that ₢hange every so often. Whats great about a visual novel is that like, in ₢ertain points in the storyline you as the player get ₢hoices as to where the plot is headed. §o it's kinda like a book and a video game had a baby in Japan!
Here's an Σxample of one on youtube, but you have to download them to play.



〒hey're fairly new in Japan and they're starting to get popular, so I figured I could do one geared towards my style a₪d bring it to the U.S. What do you 〒hink? Something you could get into. I've bee₪ having some problems in finding a programmer though.... *sigh* Oh well... it took 3 women 6 years to give birth to Jos§ Whedon so I'm sure I can find §omeo₪e to help me with one Visual Novel. ^_^

Apocalyptic Now. 2012!!!!

"The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
ェ ÐΦ₪〒 ŠLモ∈Þ Î ₩∀ェ〒... And I'm tired as ＨモＬＬ.
But I guess it's okay. We got them promises right R Frizzle? Apparently it takes 6-8 weeks to get my audio book on Îtunes!!! That's too long! -_-! On the bright side though, my artist for my graphic novel Rachel is doing a KICK ∀Š§ job on her work! Wanna see some previews?



Can you guess who this is?


Pretty great huh? My vision of HΣll and trust me I'm going to make it extЯa stan₭. ßloody pyramids, human sa©rifices, Egyptian Gods and Aztec Tzitzimime, everyone is pissed and everyone is in pain in my サell and I do enjoy it! ßloodshed and horror, thats just the kinda of gentleman I am!

 

The End is Never Near....

*¤★☆Lα’VØ₪’§ BレΦ G 001★☆¤*:
〒hankfully and finally, this month I am happy to release my debut novel, " Divine Apocalypse: The Beginning of the End " , which you can Ｇモ〒 on my website, www.novalpublishing.com for only 8.99, college students get ∀  discount so use your college e₥ail. Also on Amazon
Amazon


Check the self prom◯tion, because I worked ridiculously hard to come up with some things I know ya’ll would like. Stressed, with so much to do! But... I’m in Long Island...not the delicious drink... the place. Not that I have anything against Long Island...except for the boringness... And the fact that if you don’t have a car, the only place you’re driving is yourself insane ₢ÜŽ  Cabin Fever, is serious thing... -_-... So I guess yeah, I’ll take that back. Long Island has issues..... (Side note: The local Chinese food store around here only takes cash so I had to walk 20 mins back and forth to the ∀ TM for some dang Š₩eet &§our Chicken and Pork fried rice...Isn’t that stupid? It was good though. !★LªFF¡N☆[◯u†]★Lu₫☆! ) But I’m focusing on the positives! 〒his month or so I hope to be putting together and hopefully later releasing a graphic novel series branching off from my novel called: Divine Apocalypse: Distant Nirvana. Some more scary end of the world stuff. For that I’m working on a blend of Σ gyptian and ∀ztec creeds, which is fun, slightly gory and exciting. I’m not morbid.... I just find this stuff hilarious. ^_^